if you're still reading! :)

So I don't know if anyone is still reading these, but I thought I'd let you know something pretty intense. Day after yesterday I went sledding. I want to put a warning on sledding. It is dangerous. I ran into a tree and broke my ankle. It broke all three bones- the fibula, tibia, and talus. What a bummer Christmas present! :(
But word to the wise- don't try to stop going 10-15 miles an hour with your ankle against a tree... it doesn't work so well. :)

Merry Christmas!!

Test Day

Last night I spent an hour and a half going through the study guide for our test today. I typed up answers again that I had already written down to review more. Then I got up early this morning to study again. I got to class and was feeling okay about things, with the exception of a few ideas I hadn't quite memorized for the test.
Brother Embree LOVES us! He walked in and (in my ears I heard) since I'm the best teacher ever, I'm allowing you to work in groups of 4! Holy cow! This was music to my ears! We finished the test in 15 minutes and I'm pretty sure we rocked on it!
Now that's communication at it's best! When you hear a positive confirming message! :)
I did want to share my funny way of remembering the steps of relationships:
I Entered Isaac's Igloo By Dancing Cha-cha, Salsa, And Tango.
Initiating, Experimenting, Intensifying, Integrating, Bonding, Distinguishing, Circumscribing, Stagnating, Avoiding, and Terminating.
I love fun ways to remember things for tests. haha too bad this wasn't even on the test... :)

Dishes duty

At the beginning of the semester like any good apartment of girls, we set down some rules for dishes and cleaning and such. It worked great!... for about a week! We brought it up again after just doing the dishes ourselves (there are 4 of us who actually care) and it got better.
Now it's December and the dishes are piling up again. It was funny, Brother Embree actually brought this same idea up in our comm class. That day we were discussing conflict. There are two types of personalities when it comes to conflicts- the avoiders and the confronters. I myself- most def an avoider! I go to others and vent my frustrations, but at all costs never approach the other person, unless forced under pressure. In the dishes dilemma being the avoider, I'd just rather complain and do the dishes myself... getting more and more frustrated each time. (i just keep thinking to myself- 3 more weeks...2 more weeks...) haha I think I'm learning that I need to become a little more of a confronter and balance out my avoider-ness. :) Being both can be a good thing. I don't know, what do you think?

All about me

Yesterday in class we talked about self-disclosure. First off, did you know that 95% of all communication is superficial- regular ole, how's it goin stuff. When Brother Embree shared that with us, I was blown away. How boring! Then we discussed that it's that way because its SAFE. Why would you trust just any ole person with the secrets of your life?
We did a little group discussing and shared things like our favorite ice cream flavor, favorite trip, what we're most scared of, and a sincere compliment to someone in the group. It was so interesting to see how easy the first questions were and how hard the last two were to answer. You wouldn't think it'd be the hard, esp considering I have known these people since the beginning of the semester.
I've been paying attention to the conversations I have with the people around me and trying to see how far both of us would go in revealing information. With my family and roommates it's easy to share EVERYTHING! But then with my friends I saw on campus, it was the superficial stuff again, for the most part. We do have to take into account that I am a southern girl and therefore share a little more than a gal from Idaho or Washington would... :)
You know, this is something that seems really important to me. I want to try to focus a little more attention on this in the future. This is the key to having MEANINGFUL relationships. Best friends! Boy/girl relationships. I went through a relationship with this guy for 9 months were I disclosed SO much information about myself, and he disclosed very little- not much of a talker. I assume that's why it was so hard to breakup when we did, because he knew SO much about me... I had trusted him with that information.
No wonder we're so careful with our dreams, desires, and secrets... :)

Communication

I am beginning to realize the many different communicational experiences you can have. Really communication involves EVERYTHING! You can't really do something involving another person without communicating. It just doesn't happen. For example, my little sister is trying out for the high school musical and you wouldn't think that would involve communication- just a one-way, you're watching me audition. But really it does involve a 2 way communication. She's communicating to them, I'm trying really hard here, let me in, please! And they're communicating back from their movements or voice, we like you or not. It's interesting to watch different situations. For example tonight, I tried to be nice and make dinner and the couple I was making it for went and got Chinese instead. Communication. Me, volunteering the service, and them communicating altogether no service necessary. That kind of communication sucks! I'm not gonna lie.. :) But that's the point of communicating anways, right? To figure out what the other person wants or get your wants/needs across.
Just getting my thoughts out. :)

Relationships

Today in class we discussed relationships in depth. Brother Embree asked us to think of two relationships that we've had that have gone bad, or that we want to strengthen. I thought of all my relationships and realized several that may have gone "bad" over the years. Friends from high school that I once was so close with, have seemed to wander on to different paths than I have taken. But then, I've met so many new people that mean SO much to me, and for different reasons. I'm realizing that I'm growing up and maturing and finding importance in different areas than I did when in high school. Then it was all very superficial and now it seems so real.
Thinking about the relationships I'm gaining and losing makes me think about those people that are important to me:
My family is number one! These people are not only my family (mother, father, siblings) they are my best friends! People think it's silly that I call my mother 3 times or more a day, but when I want to just "chat".. that's who I call. I turn to them for advice, for love, for comfort, and for everything else I need. I hope that they feel the same about me.
My roommates are essential to my happiness here at school. In the past I've had roommates that, you know the saying "Make it or break it?" well... suffice it to say, they broke it. Finally I made the best decision I've made since I've been here at school and moved in with the people I live with now. What a joy they bring to my life! They offer advice, support, a shoulder to cry on, and FUN! I know these are lasting relationships because the give and take is the same on both sides. It's a healthy great relationship.
My friends at work are the people that are next closest to me. I would call them my best friends as well. I tell them about my day, my life, boys... everything! (after 3 hours of work everyday- you pretty much know them inside and out) They also keep me going, cheer me up, and help me to see the brighter side of things- or they grump with me :)
I love relationships- making new friends.
I guess after all of this evaluation I hope that if I read a post on my friend's friends, I could be listed on their lists. I hope that I am as great a friend in return as they are to me.

Listening

I didn't fully understand until the other day, how important listening is our communication with others. I thought I had the concept of listening down, but what I was really doing was "hearing". Listening is taking in the information and actually... caring? Yeah. We did an example in class where we talked with a partner and told them a problem and they did the same, while listening we had to listen and not offer advice but try to help them solve their problem by having them sort through their feelings. It was super beneficial to me. I'm terrible at listening to a person's story and always comparing it to a moment I had similar to theirs. So now I'm trying to listen to what people have to tell me and ask them more questions about it and how they're feeling towards it. Vs. moving the attention from my friends to me.
An example:
Yesterday my good friend was telling me about this guy that she likes and they text frequently and he hadn't texted her in a hour or so. She was upset about this. I thought instantly of a moment where the same thing happened to me and was just about to share this moment, when instead I decided to ask her how she felt about that? She continued to explain and sort through her feelings. In the end she ended up being happier about her situation vs just hearing a dumb story from me. It was great!
I'm going to try to implement this in my everyday conversations from here on out.